Birthdays were never a big deal in our family.  Mom would usually bake a cake or a pie.  Supper might be that person’s favorite meal.  We didn’t have a lot of birthday parties or buy extravagant gifts.  In recent years we always sent cards.

October 2^nd, would have been dad’s 86^th birthday.  He almost made it.  He passed away Labor Day weekend, September 4^th.  This past October 2^nd was a day of grieving for our family.  Dad was on our minds all day.  My brother picked up mom for breakfast.  My sister took mom to dinner.  All five of the Lillard children called to see how mom was doing.  It made us sad knowing he wasn’t around to celebrate.  It made us sad knowing how sad mom was.

I wish I had made last year’s October 2^nd a little more special.  I can’t remember if we were together on his birthday a year ago.  If we were, Dad would have made witty remarks.  He would have used his sarcastic humor to make us laugh or embarrass us.  He would have taken grand children on his lap and given them candy even if it was right before lunch.  Mom would have gotten on to dad for spoiling the children.   Dad would have bragged on mom’s cooking.  Last October 2^nd I would have shared with him the latest crisis I had encountered and he would have put it all in perspective for me.  This is the way it was whenever we were together.   There won’t be times like that anymore.  Dad is gone and we will miss him, but we will not forget him.

There will be lots of dates that will be special to us from now on, September 4^th, the day dad died, 9/9/09, the day we laid him to rest, and October the 2^nd, the day dad would have celebrated a birthday.   Every Christmas will bring a memory.  Dad believed strongly in having Christmas on Christmas.  If someone couldn’t be there that was too bad, but it had to happen on December 25^th or it wasn’t Christmas.  Lots of things will spur a memory.  What does the passing of a loved one teach us? 

 Psalms 90:12 says, “Teach us to number our days that we may present to you a heart of wisdom.”  One aspect of that wisdom is to celebrate now so there will not be regret later.  Today’s experiences are tomorrow’s memories.  Hang on to them.